the things I hate

You see, the worst thing is to know that your heart's mine, but you're not. You like me, but we're not together. You're not just my friend and you're not my girlfriend. I'm absolutely nothing.

Then it comes that no matter how hard I try, I cant make you see what you mean to me. You say you're overrated and it sounds like a fuckin' disrespect to my feelings for you, like you dont even know how I feel. It hurts. Makes me feel useless and defeated.

I cant win a war against myself, you know? Against a cold, underestimated me. 'Cos it seems like this is the version that's on the surface all the time. I cant make myself useful to you, no matter how hard I try, everyone still seems better than me.

You're not illuding me. I know I wont have another chance with you. Not now. Maybe someday, years from now. But not now.

I'm just lost. I dont know what to do and I cant make you feel less lonely, less alone. I understand why I dont have a new chance. I was a shitty girlfriend anyway. I just wanted you to know, to FEEL, that I love you. But you never felt it, did you? I cant make you. I'm sorry.